Community News Dec 30, 2012
Doc Ghesslet would like the public to remain aware of mental illness, keeping in mind that a significant percentage of the population suffers from one or another form of this invisible disease. He also says that what may be considered eccentricities in some of our citizens may have biological roots. Nippy Keen, Town Health Dept., wishes to disagree and regards local eccentricities, which he readily acknowledges, to be the result of what he so unpleasantly refers to as “social incest”: the result of an isolated population living in close proximity for several generations, therefore dissolving the common filters that prevent unusual behavior, though he concedes the remarkable ability of our citizens to embrace said eccentricities and unusual behavior while staying within traditional social and moral parameters.
Sotty Hoff’s Pub is pleased to announce that the newest batch of Verter Beer has been bottled and is ready for consumption. According to Happy Fohl, Proprietor, Miss Padden has outdone herself this year and is to be commended.
Miss Ada Sanderling wishes the public to know that she has an illness which has kept her abed these past two weeks but that she is still able to pray for the less fortunate. She hopes to recover within the next few days.
The manager of the Uringineers Baseball Club, has announced an important meeting this Thursday evening in the Coulter Building Ballroom regarding the construction of a baseball field in Sycamore Shadows next spring. The Evening Shade urges everyone to attend this important meeting.
Sammy “Blue” Bellhorn wishes to announce that he will have a great stock of healthy crayfish, minnows, and nightcrawlers for local anglers next year, and that prices will remain the same as long as citizens remain so generous in their support. Night fisherman are reminded to please be quiet when buying bait after 11 pm and to mark their purchase on the clipboard hanging inside the door. Ada Sanderling says perhaps the men of the town could find something more constructive to do than plan next year’s fishing expeditions in late December.